The WNHL Christmas Classic has been set for December 1st 2018 3pm at the Welland Youth Arena. Cost is $50 to book your spot. Deadline for getting your money in is November 18th. Draft is November 21st at the Rex Hotel.

Here are your GM’s for the Big Day

• Pete (PeeWee) Voynovich
• Ryan (Jacked) Daniels
• Billy (Bildo the Human Dildo) Topolinsky
• Henry (The Fonthill Schnitzel) Wiens

Remember like always we will be bringing in Non-Perishable Food Items for Open Arms Mission. The weight of your food will count as a your first tiebreaker in the tournament, last year it did play a huge factor. Let’s smash our 2000 pounds from last year. Get your food, invite some fans to bring food between 2:30pm and 4:00pm. All your fans have to do is tell what athlete they are cheering for when they bring in their food donations to the rink and that will be added to your team’s food total.

Each team will get 60 beers and pizza buffet at the Rex Hotel after the tournament. This event is always a good time and a great way to kick off the Holiday Season.

Any questions let me know,

Kelly Jones – WNHL Commissioner

By: Anonymous Stelcobra

This past Wednesday, we had the annual WNHL draft at the Rex. Following the night, WNHL athlete Chris Hugye took home what was said to be a congeniality– a Snap-on hair dryer. The whole night, I was convinced that Kelly was saying ‘Strap on hair dryer’, so the whole thing was both surprising and unexpected. Anyways, when all was said and done, me and Hugye decided to take a walk to the only corner gas station nearby, and buy some darts. As soon as he walked in, I knew he meant business. He walked up the cashier, and said something to the extent of ‘Here’s what’s going to happen here’. Almost certainly thinking he would be robbed, the cashier obliged to listen. ‘I’m going to give you this here snap on hairdryer, and you’re going to give me two packs of darts’. The cashier, a seasoned grifter, was aware of how he was being given the Port Dover pony-business. He responded with the offer of one pack of cigarettes. Hugye, barely thinking about the implications of not being able to dry his hair with such force and speed, responded with the offer of one pack of cigarettes, and three suckers. The extra sucker, he said, was for my girlfriend (a testament to the type of gentleman that Hugye is known as across the league). The cashier obliged. After heading back to my house for a beer, Hugye forgot his pack of darts on my patio. They were rained on, and were reduced to a pulp by the next morning That is the most WNHL thing I’ve ever seen.

The pizza has been crushed, the OV’s have been downed and the teams have been picked.  Tonight marks the official beginning to the 2018 WNHL season.  There are a lot of questions that will be answered throughout the season.  Who will rise above the crowd to become King Street Cup Champions?  Will Dougie get so high that he’ll forget he’s the ref and bury a couple real quick?  Will Gav be arrested for sexual assault at some point in the year?  Only time will tell.

Tonight we see the veteran GM’s face off in Welland.  The Atlas Steelers looking to make their third straight championship appearance, while the Stelcobras look to not be a disaster for once.  The Townline Tunnelers and Crown Room Kings will christen the new ice and introduce the new Pelham arena to the WNHL!

Fuck boys, the summer is over and now the fun begins.

Keep your stick on the ice.